How Modeling Kindness Can Help Teach Our Children To Do The Same

It doesn’t take much to make a difference.

If we are sensitive to the voice of the Lord, He will show us opportunities to bless others – even in small ways. It might just be a kind word or a small gesture, but our kids pick up on these things, even if we don’t point them out.  For example, offering to help an elderly person load groceries in their car, or returning their cart, are simple things to show kindness. If we involve our kids in these everyday selfless acts, having a heart to serve will become part of who they are as they grow up.

I remember a time when my father really surprised me by his kindness and generosity. He was always friendly and willing to help others. That’s not what surprised me, but there was one specific time when I participated in blessing someone in a big way. To this day, I don’t know how much this act cost our family in terms of dollars and cents, but my dad got a kick out of blessing people when he had a chance.

Seeing the need.

Pearl was a widowed older lady in our church who was raising her four teenage grandsons. I was in the church parking lot one Sunday morning when Pearl pulled up in her beat-up, noisy station wagon. At age twelve, I looked up to those boys. We all knew that Pearl struggled to keep up financially and physically. My dad stopped to talk to her that day as she pulled up, and he offered to park her car. As the teenagers piled out, my dad helped Pearl to the front door. “Don’t worry, I’ll keep it close,” Dad said.  After she entered the church, Dad turned to me. “Hop in.” My mom and siblings were already inside and I didn’t want to be late. Bewildered, I complied.

My dad was a mechanic. He pulled the car around to the back and gave it a quick inspection. “Son, today we’re going to do something more important than sit in church.” He grabbed his tools from the back of his truck. He explained that one of her tires was badly worn and unsafe, and we were going to fix a couple of other things if we could. We drove a couple of blocks and quickly got two new tires installed. After stopping for donuts, we topped off the gas tank and changed the air filter. I handed him tools as he made a couple of adjustments that quieted the car down. Then we went back to church and changed the oil right there in the parking lot! As the service let out, we waited for Pearl with her car near the front door, just as my dad promised. He helped her into the front seat, and the boys wrested each other as they piled into the back. They drove away and my dad looked at me with a big grin on his bearded face. I don’t think Pearl ever knew what we did, and my dad never said a word. I had a sense that it wasn’t the first time he had done that sort of thing.

God gifts us so that we can bless others.

My dad was a gifted mechanic, so for him fixing Pearl’s car was natural, and something he could do to help someone in need. Scripture reminds us that God gives us gifts so we can bless others. Romans 12:4-8 reads:

For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. If your gift is prophesying, then prophesy in accordance with your faith; if it is serving, then serve; if it is teaching, then teach; if it is to encourage, then give encouragement; if it is giving, then give generously; if it is to lead, do it diligently; if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully.

My father never wanted a spotlight. I don’t remember him ever leading a Bible study or doing much in the way of public ministry.  But he loved to serve others. He modeled this scripture by serving diligently, encouraging others, and being generous with his resources, time, and talents. Although my dad passed away when I was just twenty years old, his Christ-like example of servanthood was ingrained in me. In turn, I’ve tried to impart the same qualities of kindness when raising my own sons. God gifts each of us for a purpose, but not just for our own benefit. We can trust that if He blesses us with a gift, He also gives us opportunities to use it for His glory by being a blessing to those around us.

Can you recall an event from your childhood where a parent’s unselfish act helped someone in need? How did that experience impact your life? What areas of giftedness or resources do you have that might be shared with others? How might you use these opportunities to teach your children about God’s love for us and those around us?

For information about Practical Parenting for Generation Alpha, email oberg@practicalparenting.net